Resolution: A Brief Update

I got my money back. However, this simple statement does not begin to convey the stress, difficulty and discomfort that was involved in doing so. All attempts I made to connect with the seller as a knitter and a person were in vain. Her single minded goal was to keep my money, and she never once veered from this track.

After one week of being deliberately ignored by the seller, I filed a claim through Etsy. Within the day I received a rude email from her, telling me that I am unable to read a knitting pattern. I expected that. I reiterated my concerns over the stitch count and sizing, and hoped she would soon relent.

But no. The next morning she sends me a photograph of the boot cuffs in a different color, claiming a “friend” made them for her from the very same pattern. By now I was picturing her gripping my $4 with white knuckles. With a heavy sigh, I sent her a screen shot of the cable pattern, where it states clearly that it is made up of 14 stitches.

Actual Footage. 

What I got in return was a long, convoluted message where she tried to explain that the 14 stitches actually work out to 10, and that she writes patterns in her “own way,” and that everything was my fault—but that she would issue a refund by Friday evening.

Monday afternoon rolled around and I still had no refund. I messaged her about it, and at 3:40 PM the money pops up in my PayPal account. At the same time she sent the money, she messaged me saying that she had already issued the refund and I should take it up with PayPal. I called her out on this, telling her I knew she didn’t send the money when she promised, and that it wouldn’t be cleared until Thursday.

I believe that if I didn’t push her on Monday, she would have never refunded me.

Let’s back up and talk about her “own way” of writing patterns. Knitting is creative work filled with endless possibilities, but what she is doing is disgraceful. I have spent 10 years of my life learning to read standard instructions and abbreviations. These rules exist to make life easier for everyone, so we are able to become more skilled and creative. Asterisks, parentheses and other nuances used to indicate repetition are totally lost on her.

Her worst sin is how she writes cables. In her special instructions, a basic cable four forward (C4F) is conveyed as K2F, K2. Wow. I’m actually at a loss for words about this. It is egregiously illogical, and I am going to leave it at that.

From now on I am only buying published patterns. These patterns have been tested, vetted and edited for clarity. As wonderful as Etsy can be, the risk is too high of stumbling across a person who is only a novice, but markets themselves as a master knit wear designer.

As uncomfortable and dirty as I may have felt while dealing with her, I am glad this happened. I can use the experience to get it out there that not all slick, modern Etsy shops are what they apear to be. I want to “out” her so badly, but I won’t. Instead I will only say this: If you ever come across an Etsy shop full of pride for the state of Maine, and they are selling mostly PDF downloads, run! 

I would have rather dealt with this moose!

Very...appropriate...

Do You Shop on Etsy? You Must Read This!

Last week I felt the need for change stirring in my belly. I had grown weary of my skinny, size two needles and delicate sock yarn. What I yearned for was a small, yet rewarding late winter project that I could complete over the snow days looming ominously in my near future. At the same time, I wanted this project to be something fresh and new, adding a healthy amount of excitement blended with uncertainty.

I decided that this project must be a pair of boot cuffs. The more twists, cables and ribbing it had, the better. Maybe in a sharp green or aqua to contrast my pink rubber boots? Walking around in this bold color combo would be like giving the last dreary weeks of winter a huge middle finger!

A crochet version of groovy boot cuffs. 

The lovely wool/cashmere blend I chose. 

Since I’d never made a pair of boot cuffs before, I would need a pattern. Making one up wasn’t an option as I was clueless about needle size, gauge and the number of stitches to cast on. Feverishly, I commenced searching Ravelry, Pinterest and Etsy for “the” pattern. I quickly found myself in a needle/haystack situation. For something so small, the options were overwhelming. As I was giving up, what I had envisioned appeared. These cuffs had a lovely cable pattern that resembled fishtails, and funky, twisted ribbing. I was in love. It came in the form of an Etsy PDF download, and only cost $4. Sold!

I opened the PDF file, and immediately realized something was wrong. The pattern listed size 6 needles under materials, but the instructions called for size 5! I double checked the Etsy listing, and that said size 4…Needle size varies from knitter to knitter, but this was ridiculous, and smacked of someone’s carelessness. I shot a quick message to the shop owner alerting them to this issue.

Over a day later, they replied to me, saying to use size four, and promising to fix the PDF. It was already too late, as I had gotten started using size 5 because that gave me the 6 stitches to one inch gauge the project called for. That was a case of classic, tight-knit Vicki, knowing immediately to use the next needle size up.

Caution: Sarcasm 

I happily worked round after round, and I was excited when it was finally time to cable. This is where things went horribly, terribly wrong. Everything unraveled, so to speak. (haha) After two tries at the cable rounds, the shock and horror of the cut/paste/slapped together nature of this pattern settled in. Along with other problems, the 50 stitches on the needles weren’t even divisible by the 14 stitches that made up the cable pattern! At least not for the size I was making. These boot cuffs came in sizes small, medium and large, and I realized the pattern was only divisible by the large size (70 stitches!) Whoever wrote the PDF thoughtlessly subtracted 10 stitches for each size, taking no consideration for the continuity of the pattern. On top of it all, the cuffs were turning out too long and skinny for my liking. 

Exhibit A: Pattern is broken and muddled. 

I felt my cheeks flushing warm with anger, and I decided I would contact the shop owner and ask for a refund. A few hours later, I cooled off and did just that. Here is what I wrote:

As much as I regret having to ask this of you, I would like to have a refund for this pattern. So far I have found 4 errors. The first was the needle size, which was ok because that varies. The real problems are in the cable pattern. The K8 P2 rounds after the cable round break up the pattern. It came out muddled. To maintain a cable pattern, you knit the knits and purl the purls between cable rounds. When I decided to stop and make a test swatch of the pattern, I realized that what I was getting didn't look 100% like the photo. Almost, but not exactly. I think it has something to do with the K2 between the two forward/backward cables. The cable pattern is made up of sets of 14 stitches, and that is not divisible by the 50 or 60 stitches needed to make the small or medium size. In the small/medium size, the pattern gets cut off at the end of the round.

I realize the difficulty of conveying a knitting pattern in writing. I've been there myself. They must be exact and literal with absolutely no room for assumption. It's not fun to do! I have been knitting for over a decade, and cables and twists are my thing. I blog and teach knitting as well as crochet to my friends. Although I may not be an expert, it is clear this pattern needs revision. You have many lovely patterns and potential for a great business. I hope very much that we can reach an agreement.

Best,
Victoria

Guess what? This was five days ago! The shop owner still has yet to reply. It’s so quiet in my Etsy inbox that I can almost hear crickets. Once a week passes with no further contact, I will report the shop to Etsy.

It would be nice to get my $4 back, but I am not the type of person to move Heaven and Earth to do so. I could earn it back in a few minutes at work. However, I am going to do everything possible to make Etsy aware of what is going on with this particular shop.

About the shop: I will not name them here, as this matter is between me, the owner and Etsy. But what I will say about them is that they run a slick looking, modern shop made up of several vendors. They specialize in knitting and crochet patterns, but they also provide art, housewares and paper goods such as downloadable cupcake wrappers. They have immense pride in the far flung, New England state where they live. Although the shop is new, they come across as talented, fun people who know what they are doing. Of course it is possible that I bought the one dud-pattern in the entire shop, but I don’t think this is so. Upon closer inspection of the shop, I saw some other things that raised my ick-factor higher. A lot of the beanie and hat patterns for sale closely resemble other peoples’ patterns available as free downloads on Ravelry. A few of the crochet amigurumis look familiar, too... but I digress. 

While I wait for this awkward situation to resolve, I’m reminded of internet safety lessons from middle school. Or Catfish The TV Show! People may say and do whatever they want online, but that doesn’t mean it applies to the real world in any way.

Somebody call Nev and Max! 

I believe these shop owners are doing just that. They had a very good idea for an Etsy shop, but have yet to do much to expand upon it. Right now they are having fun playing shop and playing master knit-wear designers while making some extra money. All of this comes at the expense of the customer, who they least consider. In a mad rush to get all of these patterns online, they did some quick guesswork and bad math, which is the kiss of death. They appear unwilling to hire--or be-- test knitters, making me question their commitment to their business. 

As for me, I think I will go back to socks for a little while. I am putting my desire for boot cuffs on the shelf until some time passes, and they won’t immediately remind me of this icky situation. When the time comes, I think I will design my own pattern, after all. Despite it all, I now know the basics to create the gauge, size and shape I need.

All in all: A lesson in self-reliance and independence that only cost me $4!

Steadfast Socks

At any given time throughout the year, I am doing something sock-related. I could be thinking about making them. Other times I am washing and line-drying them, buying materials and actually making them. Otherwise, I might be blocking, finishing or fixing them! This work is never over, and for some very good reasons. Anyone who has ever made or worn hand knit socks will tell you that once you go down that road, you will never come back. The promise of lasting warmth and otherworldly comfort is so great that you will never look at Wal-Mart value packs or the funky-printed offerings at the accessory shop the same way again.

To me, there is no such thing as not having any knitting to do. In between other projects, socks are always my default. Long ago I memorized a pattern I like best and all of the steps, so the process has become second nature. I can sock-knit on autopilot while at home watching TV, on my break at work, or while waiting for my car to be serviced. Sock yarn and needles are more portable than other projects, making it a practical option to pack in my bag and take with me out into the world.

I buy sock weight yarn pre-need and stock pile it in plastic gallon bags that I squish into my striped duffel bag. Not having any sock yarn at any given time would be a mortal sin. Sometimes when all I have are scraps, I come up with some very interesting stripe combinations.

Bustin' at the seams! 

Scrappy summer shorties. 

Since I buy sock yarn so often, I have come to find that closeout retailers such as Tuesday Morning sporadically carry good quality sock yarn for a small fraction of the price it would be at any yarn shop. Sometimes they have the same brands! 

Bargain courtesy of Tuesday Morning. 

The 437 yards in this ball yields at least 2 pairs of socks that could possibly last several years, and I only had to invest a little over $6 after tax. That is the very definition of getting the most bang for your buck! Ever since I made this stunning discovery last year, I try to swing by Tuesday Morning’s many locations throughout Northern Virginia at least once a month. Seek and you will find.

My goal is to gradually delete store bought socks from my wardrobe, one hand made pair at a time. Until I had finished and began wearing my first good pair, I had no idea as to how much I had been suffering with store bought socks over my entire life. Store bought socks are poorly fitted for anyone, regardless of shoe size. Over time and repeated washings, my old socks gradually became tighter around my feet and ankles, leaving huge marks around my calves by the end of the day. Not to mention that this is terrible for circulation! For a long time I thought I was one of those women who, inexplicably, always had cold feet. It turns out the explanation for this was simpler than I ever could have guessed! 

"Warm face, warm hands, warm feet. Oh wouldn't it be loverly?" 

In many cases, the material used for these socks is thin and chintzy. Even if you buy them at Ann Taylor. Before I knew it, the heels and toes of my old socks had become so threadbare that I could see my skin through what was left of the fabric!  

I can clearly see my nail polish! 

The toe seam is usually the first thing to go, and being able to wriggle my big toe out of it was not a nice feeling. It made me feel like some poor hobo! 

It is inevitable that one day your hand made socks will wear out, too. Socks are one of the few things that knitters know are not going to last a very long time, despite all the work and effort that goes into making a pair. This is ok because they can be mended and repaired over and over again. Patches and reinforcements can bring them back to their near-original state. You can even pick up the stitches around the holes or tears and knit an entirely new swatch of fabric! (Yet another reason to save even the smallest of scrap yarn.) There are many different ways to smoothly repair socks, and a few good ones are listed here.

Right now I am 75% of the way through making another multicolored creation with some of my favorite yarn leftover from Christmas. After they are completed, I cannot wait to chuck away yet another old, see through pair. I’ll start with those pink tie-dyes!

In progress. 

My blue plastic sock forms remind me: The next time you are in an antique shop, visit the section where they have small housewares and homemaking supplies. I guarantee you that you will see at least one pair of wooden sock stretchers.

Prolific. 

If you have yet to make your first pair of socks, learn and get started today! Do not listen to the rumors that they are hard and frustrating to make, because this just isn’t so. In fact, basic socks are a very intermediate project. They are made in a series of small steps that are easy to memorize. Find a nice, cuff down pattern. Knit socks are very small things that enrich the lives of you and your loved ones in a huge way, one stitch at a time!